Aprendizado
2. Developing the Process of Choice Loving Partner
It is usually around 20 to 40 years old we started making our life choices, choose who we marry, whether we have children or not. Such decisions should be well thought out, they can extend for most of our lives (OLDS; Papalia, 2000).
Papalia and Olds (2000), is at this stage that occurs the idea of belonging, is when relationships become strong, intimate and with love, because the mature individual has already happened, and thus form a relationship in which the exchange be mutual, and each can give the other what they need.
According to Erikson (apudOLDS;. Papalia, 2000: 400), "to develop intimate relationships, is crucial task of the young adult." In theory proposed by Erikson, the young adult that during adolescence, he developed a strong sense of identity, as is ready for the stage that is called intimidadeversusisolamento is here that individuals establish a sense of commitment to each other, thus having its main structure formed to go in search of a company and form their relationship. The young adult who solved the crisis intimidadeversusisolamento will now be willing to live in relationship with your partner, with whom he chose to share his life, have children and form a healthy and lasting marriage (OLDS; Papalia, 2000).
For Erikson (apudRAPPAPORT, 1981b), acquired the feeling of being "me", established in the stage of identity, enable the adult attach your identity to another, it could be a love or a more concrete relationship, without feeling threatened or controlled by another.
As Papalia and Olds (2000), people tend to seek to unite, similar partners, in physics, intelligence or even with equal preference appearance, finally, seek a similarity to decide what will be the ideal person to share their lives, moreover try to look at the replay, the similarity of the relationship of their parents, ie, the approximation with the same happiness and marriage if they had.
To Bee (1997), we practice a process of choice before we join someone. This process is described by her as being composed of three steps. The first to be observed are the external features of the person. At first, it will be observed if this person combines physically, age and social class also are compatible. In the second phase, we observed the attitudes and beliefs regarding sex, religion, whether their choices are similar or not. Already, the third and final time, the consistency relates to the ideals about sex, relationships, family and children, aspects which are strong influencers for the chosen. So to Bee (1997), we are attracted to who is like us. Nor should we forget that sexual attraction plays a powerful role in attracting or being attracted to someone.
Freud (1910) puts a dark and intriguing at the same time point in order to see how the choice is made the object beloved by man. Showing what is behind the object we choose to love in adulthood, is nothing more than a representation of the love and care we received in our childhood, Freud has four characteristics that would be essential for choosing the object that will be loved.
To start choice man will want, as the object of his love, a woman who is also coveted by others, ie, that any man claim rights or ownership over it. With this as background, these feelings that relate to man look this way your object of choice, dates of his Oedipus complex, where the coveted and desired by another woman is her own mother and who claim rights over it is his own rival, the father (Freud, 1910).
The second step is that pure, naive and expressing extreme fidelity, in Freud's theory (1910), woman is not the woman who will be the first choice for these men. We find this somewhat complex form of choice, but for the author to dedicate the love this woman should have a certain expenditure of energy, fantasizing his beloved to be possessed by another man. Not that this woman go betray him, but the question is what causes some degree of uncertainty and jealousy, causing his manhood to a good owner who actually does not belong to you. In fact, the fantasy of the child, the mother will always be pure and innocent, she will always need the little man to defend it, which is somewhat contradictory to adulthood. Thus man, with his macho mentality, want to have a woman who can ever betray you. To explain this choice possible, return the oedipal phase, because when the child begins to have notions of what is the sexual act, and that his mother also practiced, but she does it with his rival - the father, the boy generates the feeling of infidelity. We think that this comes oedipal phase desire this man has a woman who can betray him.
We reached the third condition, in which Freud (1910) explains that the woman is considered of the highest value for their sexual skills, which are allowed only one man. These women are considered to be the only ones to be loved and will be discarded with the entire wrath if this object of pleasure is offered to others. In the last condition for choice, the woman is seen as a fragile object and which requires the man to save her, thus closing the full and integral part of an object of choice by a man.
In the last two conditions for the choice of object, returning the oedipal phase, identifying see her mother as the sole and only one man is transferred to your future life, when others may wish to have her as a woman, but only he can take advantage of this love. As for the idea that women should be saved by man, Freud (1910) says that this way of saving is to give a reward for this woman who gave you life, so in adulthood, this man give his wife a son which will be equal to it.
You can identify what happens to the individual that he establish these conditions in the pursuit of his object of love. In normal love, some characteristics of the mother remain in the choice of the object, since the man that later manifest in his choice, which is clearly visible when a guy falls for a woman aged a little more advanced than his, demonstrating for Freud (., 1910, p 174) that:
The libido remained close to her mother for so long, even after the onset of puberty, maternal characteristics that remain imprinted in love objects that are chosen later, and they all become easily recognizable surrogate mother.
Therefore, in Freud's theory (1910), our libidinal energy or also called by the author investment [1] is released to the maternal love in childhood when you create a bond between mother and son, and it is this energy that will be part of our search for a partner adulthood, when we return to this unconscious stage to live that love and care that we won in our childhood.
We can, at this point, explain what Freud puts as an object in his works, and that this work will appear in large numbers. In this case we use aoVocabulário of Psychoanalysis, in which Laplanche and Pontalis (2001, p 326.) Explain in a timely manner this term used as a:
[...] Correlative of the drive, where it is and why it seeks to achieve its goal, ie, a certain kind of satisfaction. It may be a person or a partial object, a real object or a fantasmatic object. While correlative love (or hate), then it is the ratio of the whole person, body or ego, with a target object as well as whole (person, entity, ideal, etc..) (The corresponding adjective would be "object" ).
Thus, we understand the meaning of the word "object" used in the works of Freud.
part 2
- 2.1 Identification (part 3)
2.1 Identification (Part 3) OR identification, according to Freud (1921), a character can have two values from the beginning, because the child can have a huge sense of tenderness, identifying himself with his beloved object; or otherwise,...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand. When I'm sad silences, when I'm happy, smiling. Love you so much mom, who gave me life, raised me, with...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light . Fed me , cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand . When I'm sad silences , when I'm happy , smiling . Love you so much mom, who gave me life , raised me , with much love and affection , justice...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, Whenever I need is my hand. When I'm sad mute, When I'm happy, smiling. I love you too mom, who gave me life, raised me, With much love and affection, justice and truth....
- Mother
MOTHER Being benign I gave birth. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand. When I'm sad mute, when I'm happy, I smiled. I love you too mom, who gave me life, raised me, with much love and affection, justice and truth....
Aprendizado
2. Developing the Process of Choice Loving Partner
2. Developing the Process of Choice Loving Partner
It is usually around 20 to 40 years old we started making our life choices, choose who we marry, whether we have children or not. Such decisions should be well thought out, they can extend for most of our lives (OLDS; Papalia, 2000).
Papalia and Olds (2000), is at this stage that occurs the idea of belonging, is when relationships become strong, intimate and with love, because the mature individual has already happened, and thus form a relationship in which the exchange be mutual, and each can give the other what they need.
According to Erikson (apudOLDS;. Papalia, 2000: 400), "to develop intimate relationships, is crucial task of the young adult." In theory proposed by Erikson, the young adult that during adolescence, he developed a strong sense of identity, as is ready for the stage that is called intimidadeversusisolamento is here that individuals establish a sense of commitment to each other, thus having its main structure formed to go in search of a company and form their relationship. The young adult who solved the crisis intimidadeversusisolamento will now be willing to live in relationship with your partner, with whom he chose to share his life, have children and form a healthy and lasting marriage (OLDS; Papalia, 2000).
For Erikson (apudRAPPAPORT, 1981b), acquired the feeling of being "me", established in the stage of identity, enable the adult attach your identity to another, it could be a love or a more concrete relationship, without feeling threatened or controlled by another.
As Papalia and Olds (2000), people tend to seek to unite, similar partners, in physics, intelligence or even with equal preference appearance, finally, seek a similarity to decide what will be the ideal person to share their lives, moreover try to look at the replay, the similarity of the relationship of their parents, ie, the approximation with the same happiness and marriage if they had.
To Bee (1997), we practice a process of choice before we join someone. This process is described by her as being composed of three steps. The first to be observed are the external features of the person. At first, it will be observed if this person combines physically, age and social class also are compatible. In the second phase, we observed the attitudes and beliefs regarding sex, religion, whether their choices are similar or not. Already, the third and final time, the consistency relates to the ideals about sex, relationships, family and children, aspects which are strong influencers for the chosen. So to Bee (1997), we are attracted to who is like us. Nor should we forget that sexual attraction plays a powerful role in attracting or being attracted to someone.
Freud (1910) puts a dark and intriguing at the same time point in order to see how the choice is made the object beloved by man. Showing what is behind the object we choose to love in adulthood, is nothing more than a representation of the love and care we received in our childhood, Freud has four characteristics that would be essential for choosing the object that will be loved.
To start choice man will want, as the object of his love, a woman who is also coveted by others, ie, that any man claim rights or ownership over it. With this as background, these feelings that relate to man look this way your object of choice, dates of his Oedipus complex, where the coveted and desired by another woman is her own mother and who claim rights over it is his own rival, the father (Freud, 1910).
The second step is that pure, naive and expressing extreme fidelity, in Freud's theory (1910), woman is not the woman who will be the first choice for these men. We find this somewhat complex form of choice, but for the author to dedicate the love this woman should have a certain expenditure of energy, fantasizing his beloved to be possessed by another man. Not that this woman go betray him, but the question is what causes some degree of uncertainty and jealousy, causing his manhood to a good owner who actually does not belong to you. In fact, the fantasy of the child, the mother will always be pure and innocent, she will always need the little man to defend it, which is somewhat contradictory to adulthood. Thus man, with his macho mentality, want to have a woman who can ever betray you. To explain this choice possible, return the oedipal phase, because when the child begins to have notions of what is the sexual act, and that his mother also practiced, but she does it with his rival - the father, the boy generates the feeling of infidelity. We think that this comes oedipal phase desire this man has a woman who can betray him.
We reached the third condition, in which Freud (1910) explains that the woman is considered of the highest value for their sexual skills, which are allowed only one man. These women are considered to be the only ones to be loved and will be discarded with the entire wrath if this object of pleasure is offered to others. In the last condition for choice, the woman is seen as a fragile object and which requires the man to save her, thus closing the full and integral part of an object of choice by a man.
In the last two conditions for the choice of object, returning the oedipal phase, identifying see her mother as the sole and only one man is transferred to your future life, when others may wish to have her as a woman, but only he can take advantage of this love. As for the idea that women should be saved by man, Freud (1910) says that this way of saving is to give a reward for this woman who gave you life, so in adulthood, this man give his wife a son which will be equal to it.
You can identify what happens to the individual that he establish these conditions in the pursuit of his object of love. In normal love, some characteristics of the mother remain in the choice of the object, since the man that later manifest in his choice, which is clearly visible when a guy falls for a woman aged a little more advanced than his, demonstrating for Freud (., 1910, p 174) that:
The libido remained close to her mother for so long, even after the onset of puberty, maternal characteristics that remain imprinted in love objects that are chosen later, and they all become easily recognizable surrogate mother.
Therefore, in Freud's theory (1910), our libidinal energy or also called by the author investment [1] is released to the maternal love in childhood when you create a bond between mother and son, and it is this energy that will be part of our search for a partner adulthood, when we return to this unconscious stage to live that love and care that we won in our childhood.
We can, at this point, explain what Freud puts as an object in his works, and that this work will appear in large numbers. In this case we use aoVocabulário of Psychoanalysis, in which Laplanche and Pontalis (2001, p 326.) Explain in a timely manner this term used as a:
[...] Correlative of the drive, where it is and why it seeks to achieve its goal, ie, a certain kind of satisfaction. It may be a person or a partial object, a real object or a fantasmatic object. While correlative love (or hate), then it is the ratio of the whole person, body or ego, with a target object as well as whole (person, entity, ideal, etc..) (The corresponding adjective would be "object" ).
Thus, we understand the meaning of the word "object" used in the works of Freud.
part 2
loading...
- 2.1 Identification (part 3)
2.1 Identification (Part 3) OR identification, according to Freud (1921), a character can have two values from the beginning, because the child can have a huge sense of tenderness, identifying himself with his beloved object; or otherwise,...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand. When I'm sad silences, when I'm happy, smiling. Love you so much mom, who gave me life, raised me, with...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light . Fed me , cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand . When I'm sad silences , when I'm happy , smiling . Love you so much mom, who gave me life , raised me , with much love and affection , justice...
- Mother
MOTHER Be kind to give me the light. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, Whenever I need is my hand. When I'm sad mute, When I'm happy, smiling. I love you too mom, who gave me life, raised me, With much love and affection, justice and truth....
- Mother
MOTHER Being benign I gave birth. Fed me, cared and still cares for me, all I need is my hand. When I'm sad mute, when I'm happy, I smiled. I love you too mom, who gave me life, raised me, with much love and affection, justice and truth....